Introspection via Interrogation

I am confused,

I have no goal,

I am helpless,

Is there a remedy?

God exists or not,

I am not quite sure,

Like others, I pray,

Never I am blessed.

I suffered losses,

Still I am hopeful,

I have no other go,

On God, I must rely.

Will God show mercy

And supply me peace?

Why should I suffer?

Will God kindly answer?

I am being ever kicked,

Knocked down by fate,

Though I just get up,

I am terribly afraid.

I am a rudderless boat,

Who is ready to help me?

All are toward me ruthless,

Won't the world have mercy?

Whatever I plan and do,

It ends only in failure,

What sin have I committed?

Remains a great mystery

Why God is so cruel?

I don't challenge Him,

I want peace of mind,

I want soon true relief.

I am ready to toil,

That too severely,

Why I am tested?

It is to me a puzzle.

I trust always in God,

I am sure of His holiness,

When will hug me bliss?

Will I one day turn happy?

M V Venkataraman